— Colors and Spices

This month was my first on-call duty to actually work as an on-call. This week, I received 3 calls for 3 escalated issues – out of office hours. I’ve supported year end closing but never received  a call. My, what a quarter end.

I was watching PBB’s Big Night and received the call. I was not even able to at least watch Slater being called up as Big Winner! LOL.

My original PBB Big 4 in no particular order: Pamu, Biggel, Seichi, Slater. My say: Pamu and Biggel deserved to be the Big Winner because I think they are true to their selves. Seichi – i just though he is so likable and lovable. The housemates liked him! Slater – he caught me since the beginning. Tweets say he is gentleman, good leader, smart, humble. I really can’t attest to the gentleman and humble thing but yes he is smart and the leader type.

Today I received  basket-full of fruits. Guess from who!  by Senior Execs. It was delivered to our doorstep. (OUR because there were many of us who were sent with fruits). What I can say: Appreciation. At least they acknowledge the toxicity of supporting Unilever Cordillera’s SAP Go Live.

After Slater wins as the PBB Big Winner, winning an Asian Trip, I will be out the coming months to go travel with him around Asia. We’ll be going to Singapore, Macau, Malaysia, Thailand and Japan!  Right. Happy Fools Day!

I used to dream of travelling the world, blogging and taking pictures as my job. Hanapbuhay ay maglakwatsa! #KMJS 

Note: Accounts not yet verified. Imma wait for @OfficialPBB4 to follow and retweet them.

Sleeping

I’ve had enough of hard times going to sleep already.  I’m on my last week of US Shift. With Psalms 4:8, I claim for good day sleeps.

In peace I will lie down and sleep, for you alone, O LORD, will keep me safe. Psalms 4:8

Mirror Mirror

Aside from the wicked witch, 7 dwarfs, the apple and the prince, I cant remember anymore what Snow White’s story is. The Movie Mirror Mirror was lovely. It was light, funny and even if I cant remember the details of the story, I know they did change the twists.

Hunger Games

I can’t get enough of it. The day after I watched the movie, I opened twitter, saw it trending and I was filled with Hunger Games thoughts. I searched for the next 2 books’ synopsis(Catching Fire and Mockingjay). I think I want to read the series. Catching Fire is set to be released on November 2013.  I searched for Youtube videos. I tweeted about it. I can’t say that I super liked the movie. I just cant think of the appropriate word to describe it. Actually, I fell asleep during the first few parts of the movie – that is because we were watching the movie 3 hours before I hit the my 24th hour awake that day.

We were saying that Hunger Games was like  Big Brother, due its tagline(at least for the Philippines) ”teleserye ng totoong buhay”, and Survivor. But Hunger Games is way, way morbid. Too bad that many say that most of the movie’s twists were already seen in the movie Battle Royale including the survival game, lottery thing and the couple twist.

I did NOT like the killings. But taking it away from the big screen will defeat the mood of the story.

If there is one thing that I really liked about the movie/story, it would have been Katniss, the main character, a resemblance of a future-day Joan of Arc, having the guts to face her society’s and current time’s greatest challenge through all odds.

P50 taxi Flagrate

Plus 50 cents per 300 meters. If passed, then we also demand for an increase of transport allowance!

Starting the last week of March….

If a drop of water falls in a lake, there is no identity. But if it falls on a leaf of lotus, it shines like a pearl. So choose the better place where you would shine and learn where to draw the line. Effort is important, but knowing where to make an effort in life makes the difference. -from an anonymous SMS sender.

On Training

Last week I attended Application Testing Training. I did not appreciate it not until I finished the whole course. Seriously, other people are tired of taking training. Some even just attend for the sake of compliance and requirement. For me, it’s my rest day! Ha! That’s the only time when you are free not to work on tickets(well at least for me). VModel was running all over my mind. Might sound geeky but I learned the things done at the right side of the V and at the right side of the V. Thank goodness I have a background with SDLC :D

Home on a weekend

After my 7AM shift, I went home to pack my things and went home in Batangas. Third week in a row without Friday Sleep.

We were supposed to be in Puerto Galera which I originally planned and initiated. I knew I had to go to Batangas that day and so I did! I backed out and so did everyone else except for from the couple from our team <3

Visiting my Lolo

It seems true when people say that people physically shrinks when they get old. I am noticing that to my mom(she seems to lose height) and to my Lolo. It was like Benjamin Button? I last visited my lolo last new year. And everytime I visit, i get a heavy feeling? With the age of 93, we are very much thankful that he is still fighting to live. But right now, he can barely move his hands. He constantly wiggles his fingers as if he wanted to hold on something. I usually slip my hand to his fingers and he responds like a baby, holding them closely. The size of his face is still the same but his body surely is shrinking. When you see his arms and legs, they’re like bones covered with skin and no flesh. My dad brought him old songs such as the kundiman. Surely my lolo wouldn’t want to hear that hwadbanging songs of today.
Since he was attacked by mild stroke, his speech never went back functioning… He underwent theraphy but it was not successful. He used to have that “hagulhol” everytime a person he knows visits him, usually an apo, and when he finally recognizes, he will burst into tears. Im here right now, surely he doesnt recognize me. My tita and I several told him it was me.. But he was expressionless. I wonder if he remembers or recongizes. He cant stand anymore or sit on his own. My tiya sits him in a wheelchair and feeds him with osterized food.

I wonder what he is thinking all these time. Specially when he can’t speak anymore. He can only make a growl. When i look at him, he seems so fragile. Is he on peace? I mean, when im not doing anything.. I usually get occupied with so many things.. I hope my lolo doesn’t experience the same.

My mom and I agrees, my lolo’s time will be anytime soon. Being that fragile. It makes me wonder if it will  change things in my family?  He’s the primary reason why we hold our Christmas reunions which has been the practice already for more than a decade already. When he’s gone, will it change things?

Read More

I was sitting at the upper right seats of PICC’s plenary hall atending my brothrr’s graduation rights. Literally no sleep at all straight from the office. It’s been 2 years and a few months since I’ve been in this same hall. Makes me reminisce those moments when i woke up so early in the morning, frustrated as the make up artist was overly late, and it turned out I wasn’t satisfied with the result, but there were a few of my classmates who teased me of  preparing much for this. I asked myself then, are we not supposed to? Actually it’s just my mom who insisted we hire one. Anyways, I remember it was a special one as the one who made the appreciation speech in behalf of the graduates, a summa cum laude, was a deaf. Yes. A deaf. Of course there was translator but sure I remember it made me teary eyed. I also remember the feeling. Seriously, during that time, I wasnt so excited. The kind of excitement that I was supposed to feel since it’s finally graduation. It was a normal feeling, just like what i said in my blog entry before.

As I scanned the hall, i see parents, siblings, and probably other relatives and friends? A lot taking pictures. I can see proud moms and dads. I wonder what that feeling would be. Hehe.

Attending the graduation, it snapped into me that thought of “Hey, I’m a Lasallian. A Benildean.” Lol. I just kind of forgot what that title is supposed to be. And it refreshed me the Lasallian Prayer, I will continue O‘ my God. to do all my actions for the love of You.

Nakakatuwa makakita ng mga taong kita mo na mahal nila yung trabaho nila.

Kunyari, mga Doktor na very enthusiastic makinig at magdiscuss ng mga mahahalagang bagay na dapat malaman ng mga pasyente nila(parang doctor ng father ko na namee ko kanina, tapos narealize ko ‘to, tapos ninote sa SpringPad ko).

O kahit yung mga cashier sa mga convenience store, yung para bang hindi sila pagod at todo smile pa rin sa customer?(parang yung cashier sa MiniStop MMC branch na nakita ko kanina)

Yung mapapansin mo sa outlook nila sa buhay, o kaya sa simpleng paraan ng pagsasalita, pag-ngiti sa customer at kung anu-ano pa.

Parang isang beses, yung doktor na pinapakonsultahan ko nung umabot na ng tatlong linggo e inuubo pa rin ako — matagal pa ata yung pag-antay ko sa pag eksamin sakin. Kanina nag-pacheck up ulit ako(pero ibang doktor naman). Umabot ng limang oras ung pag-aantay para sa wala pang 15 minutes na consultation? Hmmm. Buti nakapag pigil ako, kasi muntik na naman ako umiyak sa pagkabadtrip :S. At ang sakit na ng ulo ko nun! Muntik pa tuloy ako mapa-Sick Leave ng wala sa oras. Buti na lang nirecommend ako for further lab exams. Kesa naman dun nga sa huling doktor na napuntahan ko na niresetahan lang ako ng Bioflu at Robitusin. Tsssk! Sana sa pharmacy na lang ako nagtanong ng gamot no! Buti na lang, worth in naman ang paghihintay.

Tapos ayun, yung feeling na ayaw mong pumunta ng hospital para magpacheck up. Pero dapat magtyaga. At maging maagap. Kasabihan nga, An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure‘. Actually, parang mas maganda nga kung An ounce of prevention is better than a pound of cure‘.

Other Thoughts: Habang nasa hospital, ang dami tao. Iba’t ibang klase ng tao. Naisip ko ang ung linya na naghihiwalay sa mayayaman at mahihirap. Kalungkot. Naisip ko rin, sa isang mundo na puro mga doktor, pano ka kaya mag-iistand out. May career level din ba sila na parang sa IT? — >super random.

Alam mo yung gusto mo na matulog pero di ka inaantok.
Alam mo yung hirap ka matulog, hirap ka din magising.
Alam mo yung tapos na yung mga kanta sa playlist mo na pampatulog pero gising pa rin yung utak mo at di makatulog.
Alam mo yung tutulog ka na lang, tas dun sasagi yung mga inspirations mong magsulat.

Nagpi-pray na kasi ako. Nagpapasalamat kay Lord sa lahat ng mga blessings.
Tapos naalala ko yung mga dapat gawin sa office –  meeting agenda, tickets, mga tao, etc (side effect ng work)
At syempre, hindi ko rin maiwasan ievaluate yung sarili ko. Kung iisipin, nasa mindset lang talaga ng tao kung pano nya ittreat ang mga nangyayari sa kanya personally.
Parang yung biglang promotion. Bibigyan ka ng challenging tasks.
Gusto ko na ayaw. But in the end of the day, what happens is I just go with the flow.
Gusto ko to – nilagay ko kaya to sa cdp ko!
Kaso it was too soon. Ang ayaw ko kasi ung na-u-underwork ako para sa position na binigay sakin?? Yung hindi ko nagagawa ang mga expectations sakin. Buti na lang at least – SE pa lang ako. At least i have a last resort to use as my defense mechanism.
Siguro ayaw ko lang din na masyado pinupuri? Kasi nga feling ko i underwork para sa ganung position. Haay. Mejo complicated – or ako lang nagpapacomplicate?
Even the people around me. Always feel awkward. I never initiate greeting. Nakadikit pa rin sa katawan ko ang pagiging anti social snob ko? Id be very friendly kung babatin mo ko, pero yung ako ang unang babati! Still working on it.
Mixed emotions. Mixed feelings.
And the art of saying no! Kelan kaya kita mamamaster? Why cant i just say no on things? Siguro kasi madalas half hearted ako?! Naman!

So ayun nga. Medyo madaming nagyayari sa buhay ko. Ang dami ko gusto gawin – spend more time with my family, start new endeavors – kaso naman! Ang sabado ko ay nauuwi sa tulog at gala. I need a guide. A pusher. A mentor. A confidante. Baka magising na lang ako na 25 na ako at hindi ko pa rin nagagaaa ang mga gusto kong gawin. Ang mga dapat gawin.

I appreciate this life – a colorful life. But, as they say, the great challenge of life is to decide what’s important… and to disregard everything else.

Kaya ang hirap matulog – ganyan kadami pa yung naaisip kapag nakapikit na ang mata mo.

What I like about New Year is that it gives people the feeling of a fresh new start. Another chance to set new goals and achieve them. So for my FAITH Goals.

• Treat my parents and sibs to a trip.
• Active Small Group.
• My group of 12.
• Promotion.
• Online Outreach Project | Project Nada.